Last night our church had our monthly week of prayer. We come together and have a congregational prayer for any and everything everyone needs. After our group prayer one of the members comes up to me and the following exchange ensued
Les -- "You remind me so much of myself when i was your age."
Me -- "Oh really? How's that?"
Les -- "You've been living your spiritual life for so long and you begin to wonder what's the point? You feel like you try so hard and work so hard to do what God wants you to do and you see everyone else getting everything you want, and you begin to wonder what's the point? You feel like God has forgotten you. You can believe everything can come to everyone else but yourself. You can believe it for her (as she points to one of the college youth) but you can't believe it for yourself. Believe in what God has for you. Believe that God can give it to you too. Believe that he hears you and sees you and that all the good things you've done do not go unnoticed."
At this point there were no words. Just uncontrollable sobbing from me. Over the past few years one of my many mantras has been, "I believe in what God has for me. I believe in what God has for me." I had not expressed any of this to Les. I hardly ever see her to tell you the truth. She saw what was inside me and felt compelled to help. My pain is being seen. My desires are being heard. My heart is going to stop hurting. My help comes from the Lord.
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4 years ago